Like anything in life, healing after an emotional event takes time and if I had a pound for every person that told me that I'd be a very rich lady. If you've got a headache or a banging hangover the only thing you can do is wait for it to pass. Yeah, you can dose yourself up and feel sorry for yourself to pass the timep but the only thing that will genuinely cure you is patience. The cliche "time is a great healer" is a saying I hate. As the most impatient person in the world I want things to happen like, yesterday. And that is such a frustrating attitude when you're waiting to heal. Because you get angry with yourself for not getting there fast enough and you do all the wrong things to speed the process up. I feel like I'm coming to a point where the healing in my life is taking effect. It's such a bloody lovely feeling. I feel strong and capable and in control again. I still have bad days, of course I do. Things had gone far beyond just "the breakup" and I had allowed all my insecurities and doubts to manifest into a big ugly anxious and depressive cloud that hovered over me constantly. Occasionally that cloud still comes over and ruins my days but I feel secure in the knowledge that it will pass. With time. And I'm becoming totally okay with learning to wait because I'm discovering so much about myself. Im so capable of this. I could've punched people who told me "it will be okay again one day" and I can't count the amount of times I just screamed obscenities in my head at those well meaning people. It's true though. I will be okay again one day. And right now I'm feeling closer to one day than ever.
I feel inspired. There's so many women in my life who're kicking ass on the regular. Not even life changing, earth shattering ass. Just your everyday, turn up and own it kind of ladies who inspire me and show me there are so many ways to be okay.
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